Playing to the Dark


I’ve never before done an on the fly blog post.  My norm, is brooding and ripping apart what I write for weeks before I post it.  This post though…. I’m in the moment.

The photo I’ve taken to some is just a photo.  That’s completely fine.  To some others, they may look into the picture, and see metaphors.  Others still will view it artistically.    There is no wrong or right way to view this photo.

My disclaimer before we proceed:  Many people will read this blog post and recognize something.  This blog post is about no one, but myself, my thoughts, and my reflections.  They are not up for debate, as they are mine, and I own them.  Any jump to conclusions and/or assumptions are yours, and yours alone.

I’ve had a rough couple of weeks… maybe many; both in my real life and my second life.  I loathe mentioning “my demons,” but the fact remains, I have them… In warehouse quantities.  Who doesn’t, really?  I hate giving them that label though, as it oftentimes feels like a crutch.  I hate crutches too.  Although they are not what made my last few weeks hard, they’re not the only reason.

Did you know, stereotypically, I am a stereotypical male when it comes to….. *rolls his eyes and twists his face to reflect disgust*….. Feelings.  I hate those fuckers.  You either show too much, or too little.  At the right time, or the wrong time.  To the wrong person sometimes.  And those feelings…. Those sonsabitches are fickle.   You could ask those that know me, or think they know me even…. I’m a relatively calm and patient man.  Every now and again though, that F-word (feelings) spikes a fever, or hits the other end of the spectrum like it’s sitting in a cold, dark and damp insane asylum cell.

I’ve been working on this “in the moment” post for over an hour now…. *sighs*  I’m in the dark.  I’m playing to it even.  The melody is faint and slow at times.  Other times it’s harsh, hard to listen to and loud; the melody not making much sense or syncopated in rhythm.  There is a lot of light around me, but not much where I am sitting.  You see my back.  I want to be left alone, but surrounded by the light.  Is that too much to ask?


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